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Pain Is Inevitable. Suffering Is Optional

Updated: Feb 9, 2020

We all make mistakes, have struggles and do stupid shit occasionally.

  • We are NOT our fuck ups.

  • We are NOT our struggles.

  • We are NOT our bad decisions.

If you’re reading this — you are alive, and can learn from all of these experiences no matter how fucked they were.

Life is a series of unfortunate events — each one of which makes us wiser, and accumulate data to better navigate the future.

For these experiences develop character.

We must learn that the setbacks in life and grievances which we endure — help to build us, not break us. People often say that a negative event is a 'blessing in disguise.' The true art is seeing these events as blessings and not something to identity with as a victim.

Humans have evolved to fucking suffer and we are indeed better at this than anything else.

That doesn’t sound liberating at all, now does it?

Back when I was younger I believed that if I was suffering it meant there was something wrong with me — that I was failing at life.

Until I discovered that suffering is completely normal part of all of our existence.There is a very good reason for it too. Our perceptions of “this isn’t making me feel good, I need to improve this”, coupled with the adrenaline rushes from fight or flight, has keep us pushing forward and kept evolution going.

Downside is this urge to change or attempt to escape what is, drives all of our behaviors. This survival mechanism works phenomenally for keeping us going, but not so much for keeping us free from suffering.

This one shift completely redefined all of life’s problems for me, and what our human condition consists of.

It extricated me from the victim mindset.

Suffering does not mean my life is going down hill.

Suffering is in my control, to the degree of which I choose to engage with my thoughts of misfortune or growth.

Learned helplessness can be unlearned.

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